January 29th, 2014

beyoutifulAt the beginning of the year-  a  good friend of mine sent me a message that said, “Hey beautiful, I hope you’re having a great day.”      My day was going great up until that point anyway, but that little note- that little bit of love made my day even brighter.
I started thinking at that point to make it a more conscious effort to let the people in my life, especially women know just how awesome I think they are.      I surround myself with amazing people- both women and men, but yet I notice that some women tend to find happiness in searching for faults and flaws in other women, and pointing them out to their fellow friends.

I totally and completely get why-  it has nothing to do with the perceived flaws of the other women, but pointing out what one feels as ‘flaws’ of another is much easier than looking at yourself in the mirror.   It is sometimes a jealousy thing- (although never admitted), but always a self-esteem thing.     I mean how can we all be fabulous, right?    After all, giving someone else the credit of being simply amazing, must mean that someone else is lacking.

Right?  RIGHT?   WRONG!!!!

It makes me sad to think that I have also been one of ‘those’ women in the past.   Thinking there wasn’t enough fabulous for everyone, and that women should be uplifting and encouraging to each other.  They should be supportive and not tearing each other down.     It doesn’t mean you have to be BFF’s, nor even that you have to agree on everything-  in fact, I personally love pepole who can agree to disagree and yet, be respectful and non-resentful.

The reality is-  we are ALL flawed.  Perfection is an elusive and delusional mistress- I’m a believer that chasing her will rob you of precious happiness and joy.   Instead, first love yourself- even those things about yourself you aren’t ‘crazy’ about.   Love them anyway.    If it’s something you can change, and want to change- then do it, otherwise stop whining about it.   Of course, that goes for me too!   I can’t roll my eyes when I look in the mirror at my butt, and yet not spend the time on the elliptical and working-out and expect a miracle.

Negative dialoge doesn’t help you, and it doesn’t help others.    Putting others down, so you can feel better about yourself-  it’s mean spirited and says a lot about the people doing it.

SO the next time you may think about snubbing your nose at one of your fellow-females, remember we should be loving and supporting each other, and being a source of inspiration to each other- not seeing how fast we can rip each other apart.

….and if you have some of them in your life and you call them a friend;  think about how they make you feel, and then you may want to consider re-defining what friendship is to you.   No one should want to treat anyone like that, especially friends.

Now- in the meantime-   look at yourself in the mirror, smile, and know you’re gorgeous.   You, yes you-   just the way you are.   Shine on beautiful diamonds.

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